“When one loves, one does not calculate.”  Therese of Lisieux

When Gretchen Rubin shared that quote from Therese in The Happiness Project, she was referencing her personal habit of measuring her husband's efforts against her own.  “I gave the kids a bath, so you … “ (should put them to bed) or “I made the plane reservations, so you …” (should arrange the car).

Gretchen writes, “I'm a big calculator, always looking for a return.”

Which sounds pretty ridiculous, when you see it in black and white like that.

And yet I think we deliberate creators do the same thing sometimes. 

I know I have: 

• “I've meditated for three weeks straight; I should be feeling benefits by now.”
• “That was seven days in a row repeating morning I AM statements – something should shift soon.”
• "I took three days off; I'll probably manifest a miracle like Abigail does."

Yet – just like the nun (Therese) said, "when one loves, one does not calculate."

What that says to me is that when I'm doing something in order to make something else happen, I'm missing the point.    

Using manifesting exercises as a means to an end, rather than as a joyful endeavor in and of themselves, isn't what deliberate creation is about. 

In a video clip Anne shared in the comments of the Jerry Hicks State of Health blog post (thanks for that, Anne!) Abraham says this in response to a woman asking about aging:

“It has to matter to you first and foremost how you feel and everything else will fall into place.  When you say ‘okay, I'll flow the energy so I can get from wrinkled to not wrinkled,' now you've introduced wrinkled into the vibration and you're not flowing the energy.  Until you make it about joy and only about joy, you usually don't line up with the energy you are looking for.”

What this means to me is that when I'm looking for the payoff for something I've done – whether it's a thank you for cleaning the house while my sweetie golfed or a manifested desire after finishing apray rain journal – it's an opportunity for me to better find the joy in what I'm doing.  Just for the sake of doing it - not what it's supposed to result in.

(And if I can't find the joy in it, I'm better off skipping it in favor of something that IS easy to enjoy.)

This is your invitation to see if you might be calculating instead of loving.  If you notice it anywhere in your life, this is a good time as any to change it up and lead with love instead. 

I'll leave with this quote from the same Abraham clip:

“We don't want you to need the manifestation before you start feeling better.  You gotta feel better anyway.  You gotta say ‘I love my body even if …'  There is so much more to feel good about than bad about.”

 Indeed!

Jeannette Maw is the Good Vibe Coach and founder of Good Vibe University.  Find more of her manifesting inspiration at Good Vibe Blog.